The light of day is growing and as the darkness fades I am startled to realize you aren’t there. My gaze shifts like darts trying to pierce the remaining darkness, hoping the veil will lift so I can find you, to know again that you are with me as you have been all these dark days.
Fear begins to cast its shadow over me. (How strange to now in the light sense fear, fear that was not there when I sat in the darkness of uncertainty.) I feel like I need to stand, to move on, but how?
Where are you?!
Move? How can I move? I don’t know the way. What if I choose the wrong direction and I don’t find you, then what will I do?
Besides, I want to stay in the peace I had known before, your love surrounding me as before. Staying here seems safe, comfortable. Everything else is uncertain, too many choices, too much doubt. I can’t risk it. Too little time to be wrong.
Coming up behind me, you brush against me as you pass on into the underbrush along a path just before me. I suddenly realize this is the ONLY path, the only way to go. Yet, is this real? Can this be true? After all of this time are we really moving on? That path seems too good to be true, it must be false. Shouldn’t I stay and wait for your return so I can be sure?
Just before you disappear into the shadows cast by the light of the breaking day, you look back to catch my eye and call, “C’mon, deb. Let’s go.”
Like a shot I go scrambling after you. The path of calling has become clear and it doesn’t even matter where we are going. The context doesn’t matter, only the living. Even as my pace quickens to catch up, the joy of this new life overwhelms me and the tears begin to flow. As all you have created me to be meets all you have for me to do, I am undone. Words fail me. Emotions are insufficient. There is nothing to express all I feel as I am enveloped by the flood of a love so abundant, so gracious, so personal.
True to your word, you let me catch my breath and send me in the right direction. . . . [For] your love chases after me everyday of my life. - - Ps 23 from The Message
